We have made a mess, haven’t we?
We have become those people who had broke us.
We’re lost in a crowd of people unable to save us.
Are we worth saving? Because I can no longer breathe.
This lost world has taken my body and torn it in two. Left me bleeding on the floor. Begging for the help I don’t deserve.
I’m sorry I used my pain to make you feel something, and I’m sorry you took advantage of my need to make you.
I wish you would have just walked past me, instead of reaching out.
I wish I didn’t have to rely on the warmth of your hand to help me escape my mind.
Do you wish you could take it all back?
I do…go back to the before. When I felt more closed off. When we didn’t speak each other’s names.
I miss the unfamiliarity that was brought from curiosity.
Do you remember when we didn’t know the truth?
When we wanted to see each other, all because we didn’t understand one another?
When our masks hadn’t been ripped from our faces.
I hate that I still want to thank you.
Your words brought me to the surface,
I was always expecting the fall back down to the beneath,
I just didn’t expect the darkness to hurt so damn much.
Let me cry. Let me be sad. Just for a little while.
Let me fake my smile. My laugh.
Let the words I speak be strong. Let them not fall from my shaken lips.
It’s time we moved away from this place. This comfort, because the people we are dragging along this damage road, don’t deserve our pain.
Take my hand one last time. Say goodbye, before it’s too late to take it all back. Before our words can be unspoken.
End this un-winning game.